Student Teaching – Reflections

So it’s been quite some time since I’ve been on here – heyyyy!! From my previous post which was in January I wrote about my nerves going into student teaching and me dealing with fear concerning me not knowing how to teach or if I’ll have the skills and knowledge. Well, needless to say, I struggled with fear some more, which led to the fruit of doubt and not seeking or trusting in God to be who He says He is. Let me explain:

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Within the first week of student teaching I wanted to quit. I didn’t want to get out of bed, I was fearful, I did’t want to fail, I was extremely overwhelmed with what was required of me, and I just felt defeated. Half the semester I didn’t even want to seek my Father. Some reasons why I know I wasn’t seeking Him was because:

  1. I was exhausted
  2. I was swamped by making my lesson plans each day, grading papers (which never ended) and that became priority over spending time with God
  3. I was angry and selfish

I was keeping my eyes on myself and focusing on my own abilities was manifesting it’s toll. My husband Christian was feeling the weight of my emotions by my attitude, and my staff and students saw that I wasn’t confident. I felt really exposed, ya know? Like that time Adam and Eve realized they were naked and made clothes for themselves out of leaves because they were exposed… that was me. I was naked in my sin – in my own pity and selfish desires I was naked before the people around me who saw that I was struggling and leaning on my own understanding. I was naked before God, exposed and vulnerable about how I let my feelings and lack of faith dictate my emotions and distrust in Him to carry me through what seemed like my most difficult season yet.

I want to be completely honest and transparent. I was wrestling with God and I was wrestling with the fact that I wasn’t living in gratitude. Even in the first week I could hear the Lord telling me to write a gratitude list. At the time I was doing a devotion through http://shereadstruth.com/plan/psalms-of-gratitude/ and was reading about what gratitude is and at the end there were prompts on how we can actively thank God in all things. I didn’t want to fill in the blanks. Long story short, during lunch I wrote my list and looked at it for a long time and was asking myself if I believed it. I started to; in my gut I knew that I wasn’t going through this for no reason, and then out of no where (this was the same day) God started to put people into my life who were believers in the English department to encourage and tell me their personal stories of their own struggles student teaching. I was amazed and still amazed at God’s provision and how He shows that He cares for me. How He loves me even as I wrestle, and that our faith becomes stronger when we trust in God in the most hardest of times.

God was chiseling me into the woman he’s calling me to be, and it was happening through these very things:

  1. Being challenged/uncomfortable
  2. Giving me opportunities to fail
  3. Taking risks
  4. Testing my faith
  5. Wondering about my purpose
  6. Dying to my flesh (pride, attitude, control)

IMG_1057I didn’t have to student teach in Colorado and live with my husband. I could have very well taught in Texas and been states away from him a whole school year, but I didn’t. That was God’s grace. I could have been in any other school in the district but I was accepted to Air Academy High school that was on the Air Force base (10 minutes away from where Christian worked) and we only had one car. That was God’s grace. I could have taught some pretty weird high school students but I got my own group of amazing freshman and juniors that I personally got to love on, have the privilege to teach, and get to know them.. God’s grace.

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I share all this to say, I am grateful that God didn’t let me quit. On my own strength I would have, but His Holy Spirit that resides in me just wouldn’t let me take the easy route. In this semester I grew more of a  gratitude for Jesus and all that He’s done and does for me when I’m weak and lowly at heart. Slowly but surely I got plugged into community and studied in my Bible. That peace of mind began when I prayed and began to thank God for who He is.

 … do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by pryer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hears and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellent, if there is anything worthy of praise, think of these things…and the God of peace will be with you. – Philippians 4:6 – 9 

This is just a short highlight of this past semester. Much more has been witness and experienced, but for the sake of being wordy, I shall wrap this up. I posted on Instagram a while ago a quote a friend told me and it has always been a sweet reminder. Especially during this time:

Because Jesus is strong for you, you are free to be weak.

Because Jesus won for you, you are free to loose.

Because Jesus was someone, you are free to be no one.

Because Jesus was extraordinary, you are free to be ordinary.

Because Jesus succeeded for you, you are free to fail.

Remember that friends. Lets take our eyes off of ourselves and gaze upon what he has done for us on the cross. That we are no longer slaves to fear and disappointment, but that we are children of God, able to walk in complete gratitude and trust that God is good in all circumstances. I don’t have any regrets. He gets all the glory because without Jesus I wouldn’t be able to share this sweet testimony with you now.

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Student Teaching Jitters – Surrendering Fear

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As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. – 1 Peter 2:4-5

I start student teaching on the 25th of January and since the beginning of the New Year I have noticed more and more my neglectfulness in getting “ready” for my last semester of undergrad where I’m student teaching freshman honors and juniors. That freaked me out because

  1. I’m held responsible for them, especially their minds (mind blowing)
  2. I’m questioning my ability to teach them adequately
  3. Will they learn something from me?

All these things where going on in my head and in God’s grace, He allowed me to realize that all those things I worried about where all in my own abilities. I was so concerned about how I will do stuff instead of just remembering His faithfulness and that He is so much bigger than I am.

I was getting a lot of encouragement from my family and friends which helped me some, but my fears ceased when I finally addressed to Jesus my anxiety about what I thought of my teaching this semester and it was Christ alone that calmed my fears and directed my gaze from myself to my God.

I’ve been clinging to Psalm 34. All of it. I’ve been holding onto it and running with it with freedom. It spoke so loudly in my ears and brought a smile to my face in how much God is such a comforter. It’s so beautiful how the Psalm starts out in thanksgiving to the Lord and then says in verses 4-7,

“I sought the Lord, and he answered me

and delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to him are radiant,

and their faces shall never be ashamed.

This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him.

And saved him out of his troubles.

The angel of the Lord encamps

Around those who fear him, and delivers them.” (Emphasis mine).

How much beauty and comfort and truth and peace hovered over me in just those lines. God hears the cries of His children and when we seek Him, He will answer us and deliver us from all our fears. That’s such good news. When I keep my eyes directed on myself I become scared because I know I’ll mess up. But “the Lord redeems the life of his servants; none of those who take refuge in him will be condemned” (verse 22). I can say with confidence I’ll mess up, and I won’t know all my student’s questions, and I’m going to probably trip while walking in my heels checking on their work, but God walks with me, so it’ll be ok.

It’s easy to be fearful when we think about our own abilities and doubt about if we will be this or that. I know before I believed that God made a way for my salvation through Jesus Christ (basically believing there was a God but not really sure about Jesus) I relied on positive quotes and feel good sayings from people higher than me, like noble prize winning poets or a family member. But that alone never helped me when it was time to stand my ground against a raging bear that were my fears.

“He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet on a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand.” Psalm 40:2

God alone is able to pull me up from my fears, that place that has my face buried in mud and shame. He alone puts my feet on the rock, my firm foundation that will not move.

“See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested tone,

a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation;

the one who relies on it

will never be stricken with panic.” Isaiah 28:16

Jesus Christ is our cornerstone – the stone in which everything is built upon, supported by, and directs everything else included in building a solid house. I’m sure you’re familiar with the story of the three little pigs. As elementary as it sounds, if we build a house that’s rocky and supported by fragile things like quotes for sticks, or our abilities for straw it WILL fall down. But if we trust and believe that Christ is that foundation, our rock in which we can stand firmly on, even when things get shaky, He promises He will not put us to shame, and He will carry us. I’d rather keep my eyes on my God than on me.

If you are struggling with fear, doubt, anxiety, the Word of God says to seek Him and He will answer you. Imagine what life would be like when we didn’t worry, stress, fear, etc., because we’ll actually believe in what we say we do? Or, for those who don’t believe in Jesus as all, what could hurt you from giving Him a try? You have nothing to loose, and you’ll gain the fullness of life in Him.

Idol Eyes

IMG_0098So many of us want to be the point, the banner of attention, and be praised for the good things we are doing and accomplishing. Approval is not a bad thing, but when we thirst and live for human acceptance, when we long to be noticed and make the world revolve around us, we make ourselves and people our gods. We desire for people to worship our good deeds, and rely on ourselves to “be better.” It’s an exhausting cycle that leads to comparison, jealousy, lust, and fear.

Idol n 1. A representation or symbol of an object of worship; broadly: a false god. 2. A likeness of something, obsolete: pretender, impostor. 3. A form or appearance visible but without substance. 4. An object of extreme devotion. 5. A false conception http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/idol

We make ourselves our idols and it may feel good for a while. Get lots of likes on your social media pages, “feel love” from comments and praises and start to believe that you got where you’re at because of your own ability. Doesn’t it get tiring putting up a front like you’re tough and can handle anything when all it takes is a family member’s words to break you down, or for someone to say something rude to you? When you make yourself the object of attention you start to allow mere humans to fill your head with helium and you’ll only have substance when you’re worshiped. This is not how you were designed.

Genesis 1:27 “So God made mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”

Psalm 105:1-3 “Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Sing to him, sing praises to him; tell of all his wonderful acts. Glory in his name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice.”

Isaiah 43:6-7 “Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth – everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.”

Ephesians 2:20 “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

Colossians 1:15-16;20 “The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him…and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.”

Isaiah 44:6-7; 9; 17; 20 “This is what the LORD says – Israel’s King and Redeemer, the Lord Almighty: I am the first and I am the last; apart from me there is no God. Who then is like me? Let him proclaim it. Let him declare and lay out before me… All who make idols are nothing, and the things they treasure are worthless. Those who would speak up for them are blind; they are ignorant, to their own shame…He prays to it and says, ‘Save me! You are my god!’… Such a person feeds on ashes; a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, ‘Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?’”

John Piper said it best in his book “Don’t waste Your Life” when he said, “ For most people, to be loved is to be made much of…Love is doing what is best for someone. But making self the object of our highest affections is not best for us. It is, in fact, a lethal distraction. We were made to savor God – and savoring him, to be supremely satisfied, and thus spread in all the world the worth of his presence. Not to show people the all-satisfying God is not to love them. To make them feel good about themselves when they were made to feel good about seeing God is like taking someone to the Alps and locking them in a room full of mirrors” (Piper 33).

Friends, anything we hold higher than God is an idol. From yourself, a person, even good things like food, money, and comfort become what you worship and takes place of the God who has created you and made you to glorify and praise His name for all He has done and made. He alone knows and sees everything, He is everywhere at once, He is all powerful, and just as freely as He gives, He takes away. From my minimal understanding, we can’t perform any of those acts. We can’t create something out of nothing (Genesis 1:1), and we can’t save ourselves eternally. By saving ourselves I mean by our own abilities just being a “good person.” The Word of God says that “Indeed, there is no one on earth who is righteous, no one who does right and never sins,” Ecclesiastes 7:20.

But do you realize how beautiful God is in our stench of sin? Because sin has separated us from God, He made a way for us to come back to a loving relationship with Him through the life, death, and resurrection of Christ.

1 Timothy 1:15-16 “Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners – of whom o am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display him immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.”

And what is eternal life? It is “that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent” John 17:3. Joy in having a loving relationship with our Daddy God, the creator of our souls and the only one who can truly satisfy it. “Because you love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift my hands. I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you” Psalm 63:3-5.

I was not created for me, nor were you created for you, but for God. When you realize that man cannot take away your joy because man never gave it to you, you are no longer enslaved to man’s disapproval because you’re approved by God. When you come into a relationship with God, confessing with your mouth and believing in your heart that God rose Jesus from the grave, you are saved. While you were a sinner, not because of anything you did right, Christ died for you. It is loosing your life for the sake of the Gospel (Good News of Jesus Christ) that you find your life and can really live. Fully.

In this New Year, take delight that you are not the point. That life is more than you, and what people think of you, but what God thinks of you because of Christ, sharing the Gospel of Christ coming down to save sinners. Let go of your idols friends. All the people and things that take your heart away from God, and once you let go, how freeing your life will become.

Needing some Motivation

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I have about four more weeks until my last fall semester of my undergrad. With that said, I’m growing really restless in finishing. Whenever I’m about to finish something such as a long exam, a semester,  I start to get antsy and want to finish as quickly as I can. Lately I’ve even become careless and that’s not me.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes God gives me a song in my heart to sing, meditate on, and be completely blown away by how He gives me exactly what I pray for  which awhile ago was, “Lord I need motivation.”

When I tell you I am blown away with how my Daddy God guides me back to Himself. When I need motivation, it’s not me asking Him to tell me how awesome I am (which I am not), or how smart I am, or to just keep going, there is light at the end of the tunnel… no. He allows me to remember what He has done for me. That I once was an enemy of God, and now I am a daughter of the King. That the old has past and the new has come, that Jesus has paid it all. That the joy of the Lord is my strength!

“The Lord is my strength  and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him” – Psalm 28:7 Guys, I literally chuckled at this, because at this point I’m lookin’ like Squidward with exhausted eyes, https://c2.staticflickr.com/4/3154/4568451679_a6ea2ab9f5_z.jpg all hope being drained out of me. He is so sweet.

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” – Colossians 3:15-17 I am reminded that in all that I do, I do not do it for myself, otherwise I’ll get to the point where I have been for a while. But that I do it to give God all the glory,  for it is God that has given me the grace to be able to do good deeds.

What motivates me is remembering the message of Christ. Now that I have fellowship with God, I seek Him and He delights in directing my steps, and when hard times arrive, Christ will be enough to make tornado storms feel like scattered rain because He walks with me. Charles Spurgeon in his sermon “The Joy of the Lord, the Strength of His People” said it best:

“How sweet is it to think over all the Lord has done; how he has revealed himself of old, and especially how he has displayed his glory in the covenant of grace, and in the person of the Lord Jesus Christ. How charming is the thought that he has revealed himself to me personally, and made me to see in him my Father, my friend, my helper, my God. Oh, if there be one word out of heaven that cannot be excelled, even by the brightness of heaven itself, it is this word, “My God, my Father,” and that sweet promise, “I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people.” There is no richer consolation to be found: even the Spirit of God can bring nothing home to the heart of the Christian more fraught with delight than that blessed consideration. When the child of God, after admiring the character and wondering at the acts of God, can all the while feel “he is my God; I have taken him to be mine; he has taken me to be his; he has grasped me with the hand of his powerful love; having loved me with an everlasting love, with the bands of lovingkindness has he drawn me to himself; my beloved is mine and I am his;” why, then, his soul would fain dance like David before the ark of the Lord, rejoicing in the Lord with all its might.” http://www.spurgeon.org/sermons/1027.htm

God is so faithful, that if He got me to this point in my undergrad of collage, He’ll get me through untill I have completed the task, “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” – Philippians 1:6 

Maybe your lack of motivation and drive for something isn’t school, but in your work place, in your marriage, raising children, or even just to get out of bed. All God wants you to do is seek Him and remember how He’s brought you out of the depths and He will remain in you as you remain in Him. If you don’t know Him to be this kind of protective and caring Father, I encourage you to be open to reading His beautiful words for yourself, with a prayer asking God to open your heart to His Gospel (the good news of Jesus Christ). There you will find rest, salvation, and freedom for your soul.

Giving Thanks Always

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I wanted to share a devotion from Oswald Chambers in “My Utmost for His Highest.” I read it last week and was gut wrenched to say the least (that may not sounds appealing), but it was so good that I’ve thought about how that is evident in my own life. We are in the month of November which means a lot of us are getting ready for the Thanks Giving holiday. There will be a lot of posts about what we are grateful for which is good and wonderful, however it’s usually always the good stuff we praise. If there is ever a time when something unexpected happens, or we didn’t get what we wanted, we easily complain. We start to look to ourselves to fix the problem (which is exhausting), we start to blame ourselves or others, and the list goes on. I have been guilty of this myself, where my faith in God becomes weary and a struggle because I keep worrying, I don’t trust, and I hadn’t asked what God wanted to do through me in those hard moments.

Friends, we are to be thankful for everything; the good, bad, all of it.

“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present you request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:4-7

That sounds easier said then done, but God’s Word says to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, “the pioneer an perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of God” Hebrews 12:2. Jesus perfects our faith when we are trusting Him, knowing He is our joy, which cannot be shaken easily by the wind and waves of life.

I am by no means saying this as a “get over yourself” message, but to encourage you that God is in control. Put your trust and faith in the One who paid it all for you to come to God freely to put in your requests, be in thanksgiving, and then have peace. Thank God for to have His perfect peace!!!

I love you

Devotion

Ye are Not Your Own

“Know ye not that…ye are not your own?” 1 Corinthians 6:19

There is no such things as a private life – “a world within a world” – for a man or woman who is brought into fellowship with Jesus Christ’s sufferings. God breaks up the private life of his saints, and makes it a thoroughfare for the world on the one hand and for Himself on the other. No human being can stand that unless he is identified with Jesus Christ. We are not sanctified for ourselves, we are called into fellowship of the Gospel, and things happen which have nothing to do with us, God is getting us into fellowship with Himself. Let His have His way, if you do not, instead of being of the slightest use to God in His Redemptive work in the world, you will be a hinderance and a clog.

The first thing God does with us is to get us based on rugged Reality until we do not care what becomes of us individually as long as He gets His way for the purpose of His Redemption. Why shouldn’t we go through heartbreaks? Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son. Most of us fall and collapse at the first trip of pain; we sit down on the threshold of God’s purpose and die away of self-pity, and all so called Christian sympathy will aid us to our death bed. But God will not. He comes with the grip of the pierced hand of His Son, and says, – “Enter into fellowship with me; arise and shine” – If through a broken heart God can bring His purposes to pass in the world, then thank Him for breaking your heart.

If the Son has set you free, you shall be free indeed.

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There has been something so heavy on my heart lately. It usually always is, but this past week, I have been really in awe of my Father. What I mean is, God astounds me. Of how much He loves me, and how He continues to allow me to be aware of His love for me.

I can’t escape it, even if I wanted to. Like back when I didn’t know God for myself, I didn’t grow up in a Christian house hold, I wasn’t surrounded by loving correction where there was grace and forgiveness. Love was shaken if anybody hurt the other… I just come from a broken and grimy background (anyone else?). I was desiring everyone’s approval of me and was paralyzed by what other’s thought of me. In the inside I wanted to hit them and spit up hurtful words, but I was too chicken. I lived in fear about a lot of things and I was enslaved. Questions of not having enough, or why my life didn’t look like so-and-so’s. But even in my grimy and sticky mess, when I felt ashamed and unattractive, when I reeked of sin and death, God desired that I would believe with all of my heart that Jesus came to die for the unrighteous. That…
“‘He Himself bore our sins’ in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; ‘by his wounds we are healed.'” – 1 Peter 2:24

Jesus who was born free of sin, came to die in my rightful place. He died not because I did anything right. Who do you know that would die for you while you’re still self centered? Selfish? how about arrogant and cocky, or if you say mean things about them or lie, cheat, and steal? Not any human being ever. But Jesus did. And He rose again three days later so that I can be forgiven forever; because of the blood of Jesus, God’s only perfect, sinless son, the ultimate sacrifice.

There is a song that I love to sing by Bethel music called “Love Came Down,” It goes,

“Love came down and rescued me

love came down and set me free,

I am yours,

I am forever yours.”

Is that not CRAZY LOVE!? “This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins… God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in God.” 1 John 4:10,16

We are to LIVE in His love… this makes me laugh lol. Because He died for me, I can live freely from all that I struggle with. I can literally wake up in my identity that I am the daughter of the King, and that nothing can separate His love for me, NOTHING. That because of Christ’s life, death, and resurrection, I can be made right with God. I can kneel before Him as my Father and live in his mercy and grace and be completely changed because His desires become my desires.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve done and said, and seen some pretty gross things. But because of Christ, I am a new creation, I start brand new, “Therefore, if there is anyone in Christ, the new creation has come. The old has gone, the new is here!” 2 Corinthians 5:17 I am God’s forever. Not everything will be peachy, life doesn’t start to become perfect, but it becomes more bearable because God’s Holy Spirit lives in us when we invite Him in. “If you declare with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is in your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.” Romans 10:9-10.

Sincerely, when you surrender your life to God, you will not be the same. Truly. That may be the scariest thing to you, but I can honestly say that it has been the best decision, and most important in my life. Whatever is going on in your life, with man it is impossible, but with God, all things are possible. Believe it, and live in that truth.

I love you.

Zu.

Leaf it to Jesus

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I’ve always loved autumn. Where I grew up in Oregon, the aroma of fresh water when it rained made the air crisp, the leaves on the trees were pretty, vibrant colors, and it got chillier (hello sweater weather). However, once everything was dead and nature barren, it doesn’t look as nice as it once did. In fact, some people would even argue that they miss summer and wish it were warmer already and hadn’t gotten past November. We do this, don’t we? We like the pretty things and ideas of our plans, but we don’t want to see the reality of what that process may take. Or even step outside and walk in the cold, uncomfortable weather.

I’m thankful for the transitions of seasons, even when it takes a while to change when I want it to (Texas, *cough). The Word says how there’s a time for everything and it’s a necessity to shed what’s dead.

“Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens; a time to be born and and time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time yo e silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.” 

Whether it’s to say good bye or to let go of what’s heavy and burdening, we all go through seasons. And it’s good for us to be stripped bare and be completely exposed of what we need growth in so that when the time has come, we can bloom new blooms and smell of a fragrance that lures people to Jesus. That we may give account for why we have joy, and how we were able to rid ourselves of old ways (1 Peter 3:15). It’s when we fully surrender, fully let go, that God can really do the work in us. Anyone else going though change and/or waiting for something like me? Lets be thankful and endure together!